WHAT MAKES SEX SO SPECIAL? INTIMACY! WHAT'S INTIMACY?

Talking about sex is as controversial as talking about politics. It is our first inquiry when a new life is born. What gender, Male or female, boy or girl is how we begin defining and distinguishing sex. In many species gender is not obvious or apparent. So gender alone does not fully describe today's definition of sex in its completeness. Although sex is fundamentally the most important distinction in life, it is also taken for granted among human beings. Sex is the most misunderstood, abused and unappreciated aspect of living. Sex in its modern definition has multiple characteristics. Aside from the main factor that allows us to distinguish the difference within a species, sex is also considered to be an "act" promoted by an innate force of attraction. Today we label and call this allure libido or a "sex drive." As natural as it is, the evidence of an active sex drive fundamentally manifests itself visibly or invisibly through sight, smell or other senses. Sexual arousal stimulates our emotional, intellectual and sensory faculties. The "act" by definition is actually called intercourse. Like underage drinking, sexual intercourse requires a certain level of maturity to indulge in for moral, ethical and safely reasons. Unfortunately, todays acceptance of promiscuity has saturated the consciousness of people of all ages, cultures and religions. This is why there is a taboo associated with simply discussing sexual activity. Sex is both an act and an occurrence with a force that has its own impetus. As a noun and a verb it is not only something we are, but it is also something we do. Sex is actually a natural expression of our innate social energy. Whether enslaved, imprisoned or impoverished the sex drive continues to function regardless of the physical, mental or spiritual environment. Many people like to define sex by its gender, its activity or by it's physical characteristics. Neither the act of intercourse nor the identity of gender completely defines sex. Without its secret sauce, the ingredients that binds the urge to the act, sex is just a connection that results in physical pleasure and/or biological reproduction. Sex among humans carries a spiritual aspect by design! When the act of sex is not a shared intimate and sacred act it is reduced to a mating ritual that animals instinctively engage in. When sex among human beings does not engage our shared emotional, intellectual and sensory faculties we can categorize it as desire, lust, masturbation, screwing and artificial insemination. The "act" of coitus can be simulated, the "results" can be mimicked, but its "essence" can never be duplicated. The ​secret sauce that sexual intercourse creates between two committed human beings aligns and harmonizes individual vibrations and energies into one. Sexual intercourse can merge the law of attraction with the law of love and bind them in ways that last for a lifetime. This is what the institution of marriage is all about.

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It is impossible to discuss sex without intimacy. In that sex is the most intimate act we can "physically" share. Intimacy and sex go hand in hand. Intimacy is the secret sauce of sex. Intimacy does not require sex for its full expression of energy, but sex without intimacy is severely limited. Intimacy exposes the vulnerabilities we share with one another through familiarity. In the "realm of sex," intimacy and vulnerability are synonymous. Intimacy is experienced through communication, closeness and commitment. Through intimacy's vulnerabilities there comes a sharing of privacy that has no shame. Only human beings have the capabilities and capacity to be intimate emotionally, intellectually, physically, recreation-ally, financially and spiritually. The more areas of our lives that we are willing to share, the more we are open to intimacy. The more intimacy we experience the more uses and greater benefits we can derive from its energies. Intimacy involves collaborating the force of affection without having to work at it. Intimacy bonds two or more acts, actors and actions together in such a way that the longer they remain connected, the stronger and more complex their interwoven bond becomes. Many of us experience sharing and achieve closeness but fall short of the bond of intimacy. There is no greater expression of affection then through intimacy. Intimacy cannot be simply defined or restricted in its scope. Intimacy is the oil in the gears of relationships. Motors can run without lubricant but not quietly, smoothly or for long. Intimacy​ is the first cousin of longevity. The more areas of intimacy we share the easier it is to expand it into other areas. When older couples stop having sex it generally indicates some level of relinquishing one aspect of their bonding effect that sexual intercourse brought. This is not to say that they are no longer intimate. It simply means that portion of their bond is no longer strengthened through practice. As the word implies "intimacy" though shared is still a very private affair. We do not give or take intimacy, nor do we store or hold intimacy; we simply ARE intimate. Intimacy is not something we have to "do" it is something we want to "be." We maintain intimacy when we practice intimacy. Communication is the conduit for intimacy, without it intimacy cannot be shared! This is a subject most rarely delve into in a public forum. Although we discuss family, friendship, dating and relationships rarely do we talk about how intimacy inter-relates with them. There is a power produced through the intimacy of communicating and connecting that can only be wielded by those who recognize, practice and understand it. Being intimately acquainted means not only to be associated with but also an active participant in the making of the "secret sauce."

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The universe runs off of the energy it produces. The source of that energy is debatable for non-believers. but it is obvious to anyone that believes in GOD. Sex is also a source, a product and producer of energy. Although we speak of having sex that is a misnomer. Sex is more like a scene in a play, an act that is shared not owned or possessed. Sex is not static it grows matures and changes with age, experience and maturity. Well at least it should. Couples whose sex life has matured and grown with them may experience fundamental changes in their sex practices. Penetration may be compromised in favor of oral pleasures and the practice may become more spontaneous. Sex emerges as a private and individual energy of desire but blossoms into a impulsive radiant and powerful force. Sex shares it effect through, by and across nature. The very essence of all life as we know it is defined sexually. Exploring sex without sharing sex diminishes its overall effect. Sex energy has a certain vibration and may be described in terms of its physical manifestations. Intimacy and perpetuity are all a part of sexuality. What we may call a sex drive may be better described as instinct. Our built in programming naturally inclines us to use the powers of our sexuality. Sexual energy or what we term as sexual tension is a Yin Yang energy source powering our lives. Sex means more than intercourse. By narrowly defining sex primarily within its biological reproductive role we inadvertently limit its all encompassing role in life. The act of sex sustains the source of life. Sex is so special because it permeates every facet of our being whether we acknowledge it or not. Life on this planet is defined by its sexual orientation. Sex is in our laws, our designs, our philosophies, our literature and our computer coding. The more that we embrace the idea that life is sexual the better we will understand how to live it. As we engage with one another we should embrace the role of our mutually shared sexual predisposition. The sooner we accept our interdependence and the beauty of our attraction to one another the greater our appreciation for one another will be. In all of our unique diversities as a species the more we can understand about the innate substance that drives sex, the secret sauce, the more intimate we can be.